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To Work or not to work?

Being women, surely you find yourself around other women who are indulging in typical petty conversations that have to do with ‘husbands’ and being devoid of all quality time that they wish to spend with their husbands. They often complain about their spouse working all day and demanding alone-time when they return from work, exhausted. This is an ongoing debate that allows women to form conclusions and judgments based on their varying ideas in terms of lifestyle and prioritizing.

While some women complain about their husbands working all day to earn the money for a living, others simply can’t complain and they seem to be confused, nodding to everything that’s being put out there because they themselves are working women. They hate to admit that sometimes they behave exactly like the husbands of these other women, they have meetings, work, and are exhausted by the end of the day. They feel ashamed to confess to the fact that they’re as busy bringing in money for the family just like their men under the fear of being looked at differently when it is automatically assumed they may not be bothered about their children.

But the truth is, certain women have to work to support their family and there is nothing wrong with that.

Not every family is well off and both parents have to make extra efforts to earn the extra bucks in order to provide their children with a quality life and good education. In some ways, it makes a woman a more responsible and a selfless devoted mother. There are always two ways to look at the argument. Many women are also allowed extra holidays, maternity leaves and the perks of  home-based jobs where they can accommodate extra family time.

Sometimes when the mothers are constantly present at home, it interferes with the child’s relationship with other members of the family like grandparents, siblings, and father. The mother plays a dominant role, and the child is most attached to her which is why sometimes its important for a mother so be away and allow the children to be able to spend time with other members in order to strengthen their relationships and create a bond. The idea of a mother’s constant presence at home also makes the children more dependent and they don’t get to learn much.

It is also argued that women should have the freedom to live their lives and follow their dreams in terms of career.

They also have social commitments and personal goals to achieve and should not be forced, directly or indirectly to stay at home all day taking care of their children. Before a mother, she is a woman and has the right to be happy and satiate her passion. Her sole purpose is not raising her children. This also sets an example as the children look up to their mothers and are likely to focus on their careers later in life as diligently as the mothers; especially daughters.

The debate is continuous and aggressive. There’s a certain sense of tension between working mothers and those who stay at home. It’s a destructive battle where women find themselves judging each other disapproving of the others idea of a decent lifestyle. Having a balanced life is what matters. As long as the children are getting the required attention and have no complaints, a woman should be spared off all judgments. Similarly, mothers who choose to be at home all day may have personal reasons to find that lifestyle more comfortable and easy-going where they can focus on the brought-up of their children and leave the bread-earning to the male partner.

Neither of the parties should feel ashamed. Ones who stay at home may not feel the need to work simply because their husbands are earning more than enough. But, that may not be the case with every mother. Opinions should be respected and the judgments should be reserved. No way is the wrong way; they’re just opinions that vary.

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Written by HerCareer is a career community of women seeking consult, inspiration, and the tools needed to succeed in the workplace.